Convert the whole site to use Pelican instead of Jekyll
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content/misc/emotional-bursts.rst
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content/misc/emotional-bursts.rst
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Emotional bursts
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################
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:date: 2017-10-11
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:status: published
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This is a reaction of mine to a post in which a father talks about an emotional burst he had when
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his daughter did something nasty. He had hard times processing it, at the end turning his anguish
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to a blog post. Unfortunately, the post is unavailable since then (i guess he deleted/renamed his
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account on Medium), but my reply worths to be seen (in my opinion).
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We have talked it over and over with my wife. Not this instance of yours of course, but the
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situation you got in. We found that what you did was more than important.
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Even though you write the ego is bad, sometimes it is the necessary evil. You will find times in
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your life when the only way to solve a problem is using the ego. The ego has feelings, while the
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spiritual doesn’t (you can say that everything the spiritual feels is endless love and acceptance,
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but for me it seems the Spirit doesn’t *feel* it: it *is* love and acceptance).
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What you did at that moment was expressing your feelings. Us, men, are usually easier to explode,
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but it’s also easy for us to calm down. I, explode on occasions, too, but that’s pretty rare.
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Sometimes I get grumpy or even mad about something. But when it happens, I get back to my calm
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state in seconds. My wife, on the other hand, gets angrier every moment until she becomes, with
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your words, a fire breathing dragon (in Hungary, however, calling your wife a dragon is usually
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considered as a terrible insult). And then she needs about the same amount of time to calm down.
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The other day, our daughter was playing with plastic clay. She ended up asking her mother if she
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can put it in the aquarium for the fishes. Mom said no, but she was eager to try it, making my
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wife going up the hill. At the end she did put some clay in the water, exactly the same time when
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my wife reached the top of her anger. She yelled at her hard while she was fishing for the pieces
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of clay. And it took her a lot of time to get back to calm grounds, while she recited “honey, I
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told you many times not to put anything in the water”. When she did calm down, she said to our
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daughter she was sorry for yelling at her, but at that time the little girl was doing something
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totally different, and probably forgot about the incident.
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I don’t dare saying you have to yell with your kids whenever they do something bad. If you can
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get their attention, a short talk or raising your voice just a little bit is usually enough. But
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if you don’t practice your feelings before them, they won’t learn how to do it. And trust me, a
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kid without all the social skills is more than miserable.
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content/misc/weird-people.rst
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content/misc/weird-people.rst
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On weird kids
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#############
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:date: 2019-11-03T08:28Z
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Are you in school? Then most probably there's a classmate of yours who is looked down by everyone
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because of different behaviour, clothing, or whatever. Give them a smile! Not to flirt or
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anything like that, just to assure them you care about their existence. It may mean a lot to
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them. Trust me, I was in the role of the “weird kid” before. Same applies to workplaces, or
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basically any community.
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After giving up the typical “weird kid noone loves” role, I made several friends this way. In the
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process I became the “weird guy everyone wants to know”; well, everyone who is fed up with their
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“normal” state.
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content/misc/why-cant-people-lead-a-happy-life.rst
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content/misc/why-cant-people-lead-a-happy-life.rst
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Why many people don’t know how to lead a happy life
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###################################################
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:date: 2015-08-12T13:34Z
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:status: draft
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We read about such success stories all the time: people on top of successful companies tell us how
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to be successful both in their job and in their private life. These people are usually in their
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40s or 50s and, for some strange reason, they all dropped off of school around their late teen
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years. If you ask me, there are many problems with such stories.
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Education is important. Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t say these people are under-educated, they
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are indeed intelligent people. I don’t even say you can’t be successful today if you drop off
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from school. Still, as I hear the reactions of some teens to such stories, they really consider
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leaving school to start their own business. Problem is, in this business-led world of ours,
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starting your own company without being funded by one of the bigger ones is almost hopeless. And
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there is one more thing to be considered here: not everyone want to become the owner of a top
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company, why should they follow these “rules”?
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---
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I was pretty good at school, I could be in the “middle class” even if I refused to learn extra at
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home (quick fact: Hungarian schools didn’t keep their students in the classrooms after 2pm in my
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time, but gave a fair amount of homework). However, I got very lazy after high school and didn’t
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finish university; to be honest, I didn’t complete half of it. And guess what: I still don’t have
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my own business, yet I lead a happy life.
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After reading `this story of Richard Banson <https://medium.com/p/284adfa6f6c1/>`_ from Vikas Jha,
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I started thinking. What can people do if they want to live a happy life? Well, you should just
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listen to these advises. If you skip the first two paragraphs, you get pretty good ideas on how
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to do it, the most important being “love what you do & do what you love”. Let’s rephrase it a
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bit:
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“Find out what you like, and do it with passion.”
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As I see, the real problem of today’s young people is that, except a few of them, they hardly know
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what they want to do with their lives.
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